Wednesday, April 20, 2011

Tick Tock Tick Tock

Hi friends! In two weeks from today I very well may be tumor free. Perhaps I'll still be in surgery. Nevertheless, two weeks from today is when my life will drastically change.

I'm nervous. Excited. Anxious. Scared. Freaked. Ready.

I am ready to get it out and start moving forward.

I wouldn't be ready if it weren't for my awesome friends.

Growing up I always internalized things (still do for the most part) and I never really shared much with people. Although I was always VERY social. My overall friend circle was always massive, but really the good friends I trusted and loved wholeheartedly I could count on three fingers.

My grandmother and Alicia were always part of that count. I still count Alicia, but I have added my mother. My nana died in 2001. I sure miss her a lot.

My point is, I had lots of superficial friends and acquaintances. Even when I met my son's father, my second ex-husband, I had a handful of good friends and masses of superficial ones.

But that has changed since divorcing Mark. After I split up from him I decided that I needed new friends. Sure I would keep the friends we made together, but I needed to branch out and make my own - rebuild, if you will.

I did just that. But the difference now, as opposed to when I was younger, is that there are masses of friends. And they aren't all superficial. They are real. I know that now. Sure, I have my core group of friends - the ones who know everything about me (all the bad and all the good). Those friends are my lifeblood — Zachary, Emily, Sammi, Tim, Deanna, Alicia. But I also have completely amazing friends who I have come to love and cherish and whom I want to tell it all to (and I will). Friends who have been here for me all along over the last few years — Monika, Sunny, Bruce, Jennifer, Mary, Western. I won't name everyone. But if you are a friend I adore - you will know it. Even my latest and newest friends I feel close to — all the Sara/Sarahs, my new blog friends, my friends of friends, my friends I only see sometimes. I seriously can't name you all, but I would if I weren't so lazy. Just know that if I have communicated with you over the phone, in person, online, and we have shared lovey thoughts, kindness and intimate details, you are counted. I count you as my very good friend. And I am so thankful to have you in my life.

I mean, I even feel close to my sometimes boyfriend's ex-wife, Catherine. She is the bee's knees and I wish I lived closer to her. I don't know if I have just become more lovable and likable or if I just really like to have friends. Whatever it is, it warms my heart and makes me happy to know that I have so many people to love and that so many people love me (and Harry). Thank you all - I mean that from the bottom of my heart. And the top and middle of my heart, too. I really do appreciate all the kindness, support and good energy.

I truly think I am the luckiest girl in the world - or at least in the U.S.

My friends set up a few pages online. First is the facebook page - if you are on facebook, "like" the page and go there for updates, etc. during my surgery and recovery:

Saying Goodbye to Joey's Brain Tumor

And also there is a donation site if you feel like donating some greenbacks towards my expenses during my time off work/medical bills. I never in a million years thought I would be in the position to ask for this type of help. It's humbling and I greatly appreciate the steps my friends are taking to help me out. Everyone who donates or helps in any way will get a personalized thank you card I will send to you during my recovery - you may even get a card from my hospital room, written in a morphine-induced state.

Help Pay Off Joey's Brain Tumor

My friends are hosting a benefit/fundraiser at my BFF's bar, The Cellar Dweller on Saturday, April 30. I hope you will come. Because the Gorgeous Ilsa the Wolf will be there doing her famous fan dance. Party starts at 8 and show starts at 9. Squeeeeeeeeeee


This week on Friday I have my pre-op with the neurosurgeon. Next week is my hospital pre-op. I imagine it will start becoming very real during that appointment.

I'll update more and more and more as we get closer.

Thank you for reading and going on this journey with me. I really COULD NOT do it without you.

xoxoxoxoxooxoxoxooxoxxoxo

1 comment:

  1. ohmylord. all this mushiness. ;-) xoxoxo
    i'm so glad first impressions didn't ruin our friendship :-)

    ReplyDelete