Monday, August 8, 2011

DON'T PANIC! It's almost over ... and mostly harmless.

It's not entirely unlike me to share — enjoy this list:

1. In less than 42 hours I should, if all goes well, be recovering from surgery. Hopefully even recovering at home.
2. I will most likely be recovering at my dear friend Zachary's house. At least partially.
Muscley, all around amazing man, Zachary.

3. Nearly 14 weeks ago I underwent a 10 hour brain tumor removal surgery.
4. I am COMPLETELY bad ass!
Bad Ass in the flesh.

5. The scar was wicked. And it hurt a little. Sometimes more than a little.
6. I've recovered nicely.
7. I'm very lucky.
8. My friends are the VERY BEST IN THE WHOLE WIDE UNIVERSE.
9. Since my surgery I have had loads of fun. Met new people. Developed really awesome new friendships.
10. When the surgeons performed the craniotomy in May they also put the BAHA sleeper in to my mastoid bone.
11. The BAHA implant comes in two different parts. The sleeper that is inserted into the mastoid bone (it takes about 10-12 weeks to fully heal). The abutment, which is the titanium snap thingy that hooks on to the sleeper and sticks out of my head for the rest of my life.
The BAHA abutment.

12. The third part is the device. The device is what I attach to the abutment and can remove and adjust as I see fit.
This is what the device looks like.

13.  My device will be the same color as the one above. To match my hair. But I change my hair color a lot. This is a concern. My hair is surely thick enough to cover the ugly thing.
14. On Wednesday, August 10, 2011, my surgeon will slice open my scalp and skull AGAIN to insert the abutment.
15. Around two weeks later I should be able to wear the device. The BAHA will trick my brain and left ear into hearing again. Although I won't be hearing at all. It's all very weird and sci-fi.
16. The surgery shouldn't take too long. Maybe 2-4 hours.
17. It will be super gnarly afterward. Probably worse than my pretty brain surgery scar. My surgeon will likely cut a 3/4 square flap in order to put in the abutment. And then I'll have stitches around the abutment, as well. It'll be so sexy. And I will be so foxy.
I will likely look like this in 48 hours.

18. This surgery is slightly less scary - but I am still scared nonetheless. In my mind I can't think of anything going as well as the first surgery.
19. One of my BFFs, Sammi, will take me to the hospital and stay in the waiting room posting on facebook regarding my progress.
Sweet Sammi

20. I likely have another tumor.
21. It's true.
22. After the brain surgery in May they tested the tumor - it was benign. We all cheered.
23. On 7/20/11 I had a baseline MRI so we will have something to "base" the next MRI on that I was supposed to have in a year from now.
24. The baseline showed a new growth mass, 8 mm. One doctor thinks it's scar tissue, the other thinks it's a new tumor. I think it's all an evil bunch of karmic bullshit. And I am pissed.
25. I guess we will watch it like the last one and see what it does.
26. I think my BFF Emily is going to still be in charge of Harrison if something happens to me. But she will have lots of help.
My and Harrison's Emily.

27. I am more than likely going to be in medical debt for the rest of my life.
28. I may have to go on Oprah's debt diet.
29. Again.
30. I really don't want to file medical bankruptcy.
31. My little boy is so amazing and funny and loving and awesome and all adjectives that are good.
My whole life.

32. I'm fairly caught up with work, so I think I can comfortably take off this week to recover.
33. I have friends committed to pampering me and loving on me this week. Again, I am a lucky duck.
34. I'm on week 2 of Couch to 5K - I've been on week two for about 37 weeks now. I am rad, I know.
35. I wanted a perm in my hair, but my stylist told me that it wouldn't work in my hair and it would look like cotton candy. I hope she will at least come over and trim my bangs this week, since I will have a massive new scar and will feel super ugly.
My cute stylist and friend, Jennie.

36. She's smart, though. So I trust her.
37. I hope that Zachy will make me some BBQ pot roast sandwiches whilst I am recovering.
38. I hope to get lots of foot rubs during my recovery. It's imperative for the success of my recovery. I swear, it's true, TD! ;-)
39. I'm fairly sure my Monika (also in my BFF circle) will be taking care Harry some this week. At least a little.
Pretty Monika

40. But I will probably have him most of the time.
41. I'm going to get through this, right? Please tell me that I am. I'm scared.
42. And finally, yes, I am a geek.

Ancora Imparo!

5 comments:

  1. You are totally going to rock this

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  2. Bubba is the best in the west when it comes to pampering, indulging, humoring and spoiling!!!
    You'll have a fun recovery.
    You may ask him privately how he got his early training
    in caring for the 'weak'......

    We're with you Joey!!!!!

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  3. 2-4 hours? pahhhlease! Easy Peasy! You can handle this! I won't be posting long on fb at all! :-) xoxoxo

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  4. I love you! Let's have smoothies after surgery ;)

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  5. You will rock this. Any scar tissue/tumor will balk before your awesomeness. And you will get trimmed bangs. This ginger geek has spoken, and so it shall be.

    (and good luck, hugs, and prayers!)

    ReplyDelete